Lack Of Intimacy After a Baby? 5 Things You Need To Try Now
Childbirth is one of the most amazing events to take place in a couple’s lives. The wondrous journey of conception and pregnancy that culminates in the birth of a child is magnificent, and most couples will say that it is the most meaningful experience of their lifetimes.
There are many sacrifices to make along the way, though, and one of them is difficulties with postpartum intimacy. For women, hormonal changes and vaginal trauma are two issues that can cause problems with intimacy after a child is born.
Men are sometimes not sufficiently conscious of these issues, resulting in misunderstanding and hurt feelings, disrupting intimacy further. Also, there is a new member of the family who requires round-the-clock attention, leaving little available time for intimate pleasures.
5 Strategies to Avoid Lack Of Intimacy After A Baby
Fortunately, there are effective strategies that couples can utilize to create intimacy during the first weeks after childbirth, so with patience and some creativity, a healthy sex life is easily attainable. There is no need to forgo intimacy after childbirth, provided that both parties communicate openly about the subject and are willing to make some adjustments to accommodate their partner’s needs.
1. Plan Intercourse After Childbirth
Health care providers typically recommend waiting four to six weeks after giving birth to engage in sexual intercourse. This healing process is especially true if there is an episiotomy procedure during childbirth, or there is any perineal tearing. To learn more about the healing process, look here for an article from the Mayo Clinic.
The good news is that sexual intimacy can be possible for couples after childbirth if they plan accordingly. A plan for intimacy after childbirth is practical and helpful because it decreases any anxiety that couples may experience regarding the subject. Although this is uncharted territory, most will find that intimacy after the birth of a child is exciting and can even enhance the relationship.
2. Make Time for Intimacy
Life with a newborn is hectic and often leaves no time at all for the kind of privacy necessary for intimacy. While sexual passions often develop spontaneously, with a baby in the house some planning for intimacy is essential, so that the time a couple spends together is uninterrupted. Babies are unpredictable, and some thought about this plan is necessary.
Chances are, there is a time when the newborn is always asleep. Usually, after they are put down for the night, babies may fuss a little at first, but then they generally sleep for an hour or two at the very least. These are excellent windows of opportunity for intimacy. Make them special times by planning the use of things like candles and lingerie. Have fun making a date with your partner for, say ten o’clock at night. Patience and a good sense of humor are critical here, because the baby may wake up unexpectedly and spoil the fun. Getting up and taking care of the baby while having sex is a natural occurrence that humans have been dealing with forever, so the key is not to get uptight.
Understanding friends and relatives can watch the baby when the couple needs some alone time. A rendezvous at a hotel or other location is exciting and provides privacy while leaving the infant in the care of someone trustworthy who can call at a moment’s notice. These occasions are memorable and can be made more so by things like a bottle of good champagne.
3. Explore Different Types of Sexual Intimacy
During the time that intercourse is off the table, other kinds of sexual stimulation are the only option. Rather than viewing this restriction as an obstacle to intimacy, use it as an exciting opportunity to explore each other’s sexuality in different ways. There are many ways for a couple to give pleasure to one another besides vaginal penetration and this is a time to be imaginative. Getting creative in this area is sensual and erotic, leading to new levels of pleasure that add to the relationship sexually.
4. Enhance Sexual Attraction
Women may sometimes worry about the level of sexual attraction that men feel for them after pregnancy. It is common for women to worry that their husband might not be attracted to them any longer. This concern, coupled with low sex drive, can lead to men feeling frustrated and upset. In these situations, it is up to the man to alleviate the concerns a woman may have, and there are ways to accomplish this objective. Purchasing items such as sexy underwear and perfume for women send a clear signal that a man’s desire has not waned. Likewise, colognes for men are an excellent way for men to communicate ardor to their partner. Many women agree that colognes for men are sexually stimulating.
5. Share the Responsibility of Infant Care
Caring for an infant is a big job, and fairness dictates that both parents assume an equal share of this responsibility. Sometimes, a woman can end up with a disproportionate amount of this job, and this can lead to problems with intimacy. Not only might she feel resentful about this inequity, but the excessive amount time spent caring for the child could make her too tired for any extra-curricular activities. Proper distribution of time on the job will lead to well-rested, happy partners who will, in turn, be more interested in intimacy.
In summation, although intimacy after childbirth can be a challenge, it is far from impossible. With an understanding of the issues at hand, and a plan to address them, a couple will be able to enjoy the kind of marvelous intimacy that led to the conception of the beautiful child that they now share.
I have researched extensively the best online resources that can help you saving your marriage (even if you’re the only one trying), and I recommend the one below, as it’s the most effective and comprehensive, and has the highest success rate.
Welcome to my marriage and relationship advice blog! If you’re having intimacy issues in your marriage or relationship you’ve come to the right place. In this blog I share the best of the best on how to fix a sexless marriage and to deal with other intimacy-related problems.