Get Over Your Ex in 7 Easy Steps and Enjoy Your New Life

shutterstock_570702937A break-up brings a lot of stress and emotional pressure and you might find it nearly impossible to get over your ex who was very close to you just a few days back. The truth is, it is not easy to get over your ex in a day or two. But you can put some conscious effort to reduce stress and to head towards a fresh new life with a positive approach. Are you looking some useful tips to make it easier to handle? If yes, then consider the followings.

How To Get Over Your Ex

1. Do not suppress your emotions.
If you are feeling hurt, frustrated or betrayed and you want to express your emotions then don’t hold it all inside. Cry it out. It will make you feel better. You can also visit a gym and use a punching bag to express all your emotions and anger. Just don’t unleash your fury on anyone (!) or how get over your ex might become the least of your worries.

2. Stay away from all forms of contacts
When a relationship is over, you do not want to revisit it in any manner. Make it a point to avoid anything that brings you closer to thinking about your ex. You should avoid talking about your ex with your close friends or any of the friends that you have in common. If your ex is connected to you by social media, make sure that you have cut off all the relations. Resist the temptation to find out about your ex’s life after the break up. Don’t fall into the traps of “have they moved on already”? You really don’t want to see any pictures of them popping up on your feed, especially when the break-up is still fresh. You should not follow them or contact them and should ignore any attempt from them to try to contact you. Avoid any opportunity that can create a new hope for the lost relationship.

3. Concentrate on your family
During bad times, your family is the one who can come to your rescue. It is likely that you will feel a bit lonely after the break-up, and that your need for affection will be heightened. Even if you do not want to share your privacy and relationship status with your family, you can try to spend more time with them to restore your confidence and to fulfil your need for affection.

4. Stop over-analyzing
In the wake of a break-up people tend to over-analyze things to find out any hidden reasons for such outcome. You might get caught up thinking about that one time you did or said something that could have contributed to the break-up. This will trigger feelings of guilt and regret. By doing so, you are just revisiting a relationship that does not exist for you anymore. This will just bring more emotional stress to you and will never allow you to get over your ex completely. You will have to stop regretting and start concentrating on other things to forget your past relationship.

5. Stay active

Once a relationship is over, you will have to accept it as over with all our mind and heart. You will have to move on and look for the things that can give you pleasure and happiness.

Focus more on your hobbies and get involved in some new activities to divert your attention from the break-up. Being active will also trigger the release of the so-called happiness hormones, which will result in a general sense of satisfaction and well-being. A trip abroad, a new sport, a new fancy restaurant in town. The list of things that you can do to keep your mind and body occupied is unlimited. Anything but sitting at home alone crying will be fine.

6. No sex with your ex
While it is normal to miss the intimacy that you had with your ex, it would not be healthy for you to seek it after the break-up. It might be easy to give in to temptation, especially when nostalgia and loneliness are mixed a few drinks. But think about it: If your relationship has ended, there must be a reason, right? Having sex with your ex will just mess about with your emotions even more, making your break-up a lot more difficult to get over.

7. Enjoy your freedom
Instead of regretting your past, you should take advantage of your re-found freedom. You now have the time to do all the things that you did not have time to do while being in the relationship. Visit your friends, meet new people, spend more time in the gym, and dedicate more time looking after your body, your health and passions. Remember one thing: whenever someone walks away from your life, they are creating an opportunity for a new beginning.

'New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings' --LaoTzuClick To Tweet

My experience

I’ve been through a few break-ups myself, and one of them in particular was messy and quite painful. This was mainly because I did not follow any of the above advice. I checked out my ex’s social media, and I drunk-texted her multiple times. I missed her and I could’t stand the fact that she had moved on so quickly after the break-up. Also, I couldn’t figure out how come I missed her. I had always thought she wasn’t the right person for me, and the break-up was mostly my decision. After a month or two of suffering, however, I realized one important thing: I had to let her go in order to make space for someone better to step in. The break-up was my opportunity to change my life around for the better.

No matter how painful a break up can be, you have the power to move on and embrace the change in your life. People are afraid of change, but change is a good thing. Life is constantly changing, and the only things that never change are the dead things. As long as you have blood in your veins you will go through many changes. You will suffer, but then you will rise from your ashes like a phoenix, stronger than before. It won’t be that difficult to get over your ex if you will prepare your mind for a fresh start. Stay organized and follow your passions and dreams to welcome a new happy life.

Ivan Verr is a self-development & relationship coach, with a passion for helping singles and couples building a beautiful relationship.

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