How to Fix a Bad Relationship: Spot These Warning Signs On Time

Couple arguing. Unhealthy relationship. How to fix a bad relationship

If you are wondering how to fix a bad relationship, you’ve come to the right place. A bad relationship is something that nobody wants to be in. It can be stressful and straining for both parties when a relationship is unhealthy. Unhealthy relationships, however, can still be mended. The greatest relationship advice to heal an unhealthy relationship is for the two people involved to exert effort in fixing it. To make things work out for your relationship, first, examine 7 warning signals of an unhealthy relationship.

7 Warning Signals of an Unhealthy Relationship

1. Excessive Control
Controlling relationships take on many forms. A partner who must win all disputes regardless of the consequences is controlling. Partners who devote all of their attention to the other partner are controlling. A partner who constantly pressures the other to change is controlling. Others who control force a withdrawal from all other friendships and social contacts. In the end, excessive control diminishes self-respect and self-identity, eliminating the expression of true feelings and passions.

2. Deception
Unhealthy relationships are void of honesty. Secrets become lies, constantly fuelling the destructiveness of deception. Deception is manipulation and trickery and dishonesty. If a couple cannot overcome the lies, the relationship is likely to fail.

3. Lack of Support
Support is a measurement of commitment. It means desiring to spend time with one another – and enjoying it. Support means communicating with each other, finding ways to solve individual frustrations and to strengthen the relationship. Without support, there is no commitment. A lack of support intensifies problems in relationships and the relationship overall is at risk.

4. Persistent Anger
Relationship problems become insurmountable when a couple cannot let go of that which should have been forgiven. In a relationship void of forgiveness, anger works to destroy mutual respect. Relentless anger is a negative force that fuels resentment and leads to regret. Eventually, persistent anger will destroy a relationship, replacing any hope of communication with overwhelming name calling and accusations. Persistent anger destroys compromise. It paves the way for a life without apology.

5. Lack of Individuality
In a lasting relationship, each partner is comfortable with their own individuality. Individuality is about sharing the good and the bad, and working in harmony to strengthen the relationship. When a partner abandons personal individuality and seeks identity only through the other person, the relationship is at risk.

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6. Abandoning Trust
Perhaps the strongest signal of an unhealthy relationship is the absence of trust. In order to work, a relationship must be founded on trust for a partner and trust in our own instincts to do the right thing. An abandonment of trust is fuelled by insecurity and doubt. Left unchecked, an abandonment of trust will eventually destroy a relationship.

7. End of Intimacy
Most people are aware that intimacy plays a major role in a healthy and loving relationship. No, we are not just talking about sex here as much as how crucial intimate moments are to a relationship.

Remember when your relationship was new? You would walk holding hands or hug when you met. Do you still do that? These types of romantic gestures will help to ensure the intimacy stays alive in your relationship.

These are some of the signs to watch for in order to see if your relationship is unhealthy. If you recognize your relationship in any of the above, you should take action immediately in order to restore the balance. The following guidelines will help you through the relationship healing process.

How to Fix a Bad Relationship

1. Discover the Underlying Cause
While some couples already have a grasp of the underlying problem, others still need to give enough time in evaluating where things went wrong. What is essential is discovering the fundamental cause of the problem and not just the effects. For instance, you might be angry at your partner for not spending enough time with you, but this might not be the actual problem. Your insecurity and desire for more assurance from your partner could be the root cause of the problem.

2. Accept That You Should Do Something
Once you have identified the underlying issues of the problem, don’t use it as a chance to blame or be mad at each other. Just admit that you have the responsibility to do something instead. Admit that the relationship needs working out and that you might have contributed to the problems. The most important thing of all is to admit that you can do something to fix your relationship.

couple-18539963. Forgive Your Partner
It is very important that you learn to forgive your partner. If you keep holding on to the negative feelings you have against your partner, you will not be able to come up with a clear solution to all your issues. It might take some time to completely heal emotionally, but when you have a forgiving spirit you are making significant progress towards recovery.

4. Rise Above Your Destructive Behaviours
Relationships can be destroyed physically or psychologically by destructive behaviours that everyone has. Reflect and try to discover the behaviours that you have that are not constructive for the relationship or are hurting you as a couple. Take time to diagnose the possible reasons behind the habits and then make it a point to stop doing them.

5. Practice Positive Habits in Your Relationship
After you have overcome your destructive behaviours, try to absorb healthy relationship habits to replace them. These positive habits can be simple acts of kindness and love or having a positive outlook in the relationship. The bottom line is that you cultivate trust and start supportive habits that are conducive to developing a healthy relationship.

6. Move forward as a couple
By now, you should have realized new insights and let go of any negative thoughts and actions you previously had in your life. The final and most important step now is to move on together with your partner to a new phase in your relationship. Learn from your past faults and mistakes, but don’t bring them up anymore. Consider this stage an opportunity to start all over and build a healthy relationship.

An unhealthy relationship can change for the better, but only with a great deal of patience and commitment. Both partners must be accountable for their actions, and for their willingness to work past their differences. It’s important that any couples dealing with these issues learn how to handle them as a couple. Both parties need to do what is necessary to keep the relationship solid and prevent hardships. With the right mindset and investing enough time, there is still hope to fix an unhealthy relationship.

Ivan Verr is a self-development & relationship coach, with a passion for helping singles and couples building a beautiful relationship.

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